By Hugh Lord
Kurt Cobain was born in Aberdeen, WA, to an abusive father and mother, by modern standards, and was a very sweet child until his parents decided to get divorced. This made Kurt rebellious and confused, then he dropped out of high school knowing he didn’t have the grades to graduate.
In 1987, he started up what would become Nirvana with his friend from high school, Krist Novoselic. Then in 1988, they got a drummer called Chad Channing, completing the band and in 1989 they released their debut album “Bleach.” Dave Grohl joined the band in September 1990 after Channing left. Then Nirvana released their albums “Nevermind,” which made them one of the biggest bands in the world, and “In Utero.”
But all this came with a cost. After “Nevermind” topped the charts in January 1992, Cobain felt overwhelmed by the fame and media scrutiny. His mental health also started to go downhill. He had always had mental health struggles, but in journals he revealed feelings of alienation and pressure from fans and the music industry.
In mid-1992 Cobain also developed worse chronic stomach pain (which was never officially diagnosed), exacerbating his overall discomfort. He was using heroin at the time, partially to cope with the stomach pain, stress, and history of depression. All this escalated in 1991-1992, and during the Australian “Nevermind” tour, his addiction was noticeable, with people reporting withdrawal symptoms.
In the months coming up to Cobain’s death on April 5, 1994, his mental health worsened significantly, and his heroin use was so severe it was making him skinny and frail. During the final tour, through January-March 1994, he was seen by his band members as moody and detached. In Seattle in early April, he avoided contact with most friends and family.
So, it’s safe to say he was reaching a breaking point, and it’s natural for people to assume he committed suicide. On the surface, it’s easy to see why someone this depressed and addicted would do that. But I don’t believe it, for four main reasons.
1. The shotgun was too long: Six days before Cobain’s death, he bought a Remington Model 11 20-gauge semi-automatic shotgun, which has a barrel length of around 28 inches, an overall length of 46-50 inches, and a receiver around 6-8 inches long. This would make the distance from the top of the barrel to the trigger roughly 34-35 inches. Cobain was around 5’ 9”, so an arm length of roughly 27-30 inches would be typical for his height.
Physically, there was no way for him to pull the trigger with the barrel pointed above his nose, at least not with his hands as the police report claimed. I’ve heard some people say he could have done it with his foot, but crime scene pictures first released in 2014 revealed that he was wearing sneakers. He also had three times the lethal dose of black tar heroin in him, so even if he could get his hands on the trigger, it would probably make it difficult for him to do so while overdosing.
2. Forensic evidence: The shotgun had no legible fingerprints on it, which Tom Grant (a private investigator hired by Courtney Love, Cobain’s wife) thought highly suspicious, suggesting that someone had intentionally wiped them off, or incompetent crime scene handling. Grant also said that the shell casing position on the floor did not align with what he expected from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.
3. The suicide note: The alleged suicide note found at the crime scene had multiple inconsistencies. For example, if you look at the whole suicide note, it has differing handwriting styles. I know if Cobain was overdosing his handwriting might be different, but Rosemary Carroll, Cobain’s attorney, found a “handwriting practice sheet” in a backpack left in her office by Courtney Love two days before Cobain’s death. This sheet had letter combinations resembling Cobain’s printed handwriting, mostly those found in the last four lines of his suicide note.
4. Courtney Love herself: When Grant was working with Love, he claims she did a variety of suspicious things. Like manipulating event timelines, providing misleading information about Cobain’s whereabouts, and having an obvious motive: control of Cobain’s estate.
Grant also says that Love gave him conflicting stories, such as saying that Cobain was suicidal, but Nirvana’s management and Carroll said he wasn’t. One person who came forward was Eldon “El Duce” Hoke, who said that Courtney Love offered him $50,000 to “whack” Cobain. He made this claim in a 1997 interview with filmmaker Nick Broomfield for the documentary Kurt & Courtney, and said the offer was made in late December 1993 outside The Rock Shop, a Hollywood record store where Hoke worked part-time. Hoke said he declined, but suggested he knew someone named “Allen” (later identified as musician Allen Wrench) who might have been involved. Directly after Cobain’s death, Wrench suddenly got himself a new Lexus, a recording studio, and a European tour for his band.
I don’t 100% believe that Courtney Love killed Kurt Cobain (even though it is suspicious). What I do believe is that Kurt Cobain couldn’t have killed himself because of the reasons stated above. And, this is just my opinion, but Cobain had a daughter to live for, Frances Bean. In a 1993 interview with Rolling Stone, he said “I knew that when I had a child, I’d be overwhelmed, and it’s true. I can’t tell you how much my attitude has changed since we’ve got Frances. Holding my baby is the best drug in the world.” Something tells me Kurt Cobain would have wanted to see her grow into a woman if he loved her that much.
