By Marc J. Elzenbeck “All creatures great and small,All things bright and beautiful;All things wise and wonderful,The Lord God made them all.” Sipping a second cup of coffee at around 10:00 a.m., the phone rang. The caller said, “So, your cow. She wrecked my truck.” Stronger words may have been used. Bottom line, our girl…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck It’s true that when you travelyou’re never free of Woody Allen.Every sidewalk artist knows himand four score more sketchable actorswho’ll ambush you from here to Thailandicons of the monoculture from which we come. Such harbingers. It reminds me how the prophetssaid the ends of earth express a single sum.Some foretell of…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck As with many great ideas, it started with a Ford Bronco and a keg of beer. On a Friday night before the Strawberry Festival, several earth-movers and excavators were gathered around a job site after knocking off work. They happened to be parked near an old peat bog pond west of town,…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck Hot as the Dot-Com bubble may have been, the AI bubble is blazing. There are strong connections between now and then. At its height in 1999, a smallish company named Sun Microsystems made computers key to powering the graphical internet, and its stock was bid to a staggering 10x price to…
Due to staffing shortages in unincorporated areas, the King County Sheriff’s Office has updated its General Orders Manual to certify residents for recording and reporting speeders. A volunteer is pictured on Cemetery Road deploying a county-issued radar gun and camera recorder. According to the Deputy, “One little red Honda is going to get a very…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck Call me stupid. My auto and home insurance stayed nearly unchanged for the most part of a decade, with only minor upticks reflecting an occasional policy adjustment. Towing coverage was added on a couple vehicles, plus a separate umbrella covering teenager mishap, malfeasance, or vandalism. Starting in January 2022, both basics…
By Ivan SnowaTranslated by Marc J. Elzenbeck I see you on the beach so healthywith umbrella yellow and the sunheating strong and rolling overinto my skin with pleasant panic. You’re with the babies smilinglaughing but beckoning me backfrom the waves where I’m drowningI snap awake and grab the wheel. Scraping the mile marker post47 just…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck With much care, and over months, our foster cow Leslie’s terrible wound began to heal under daily debriding and cleaning. Amazingly, what had been a deep, two-foot-long gash in her left shoulder, imitating for all appearances a hanging flank steak, gradually closed back together and began smoothing out into short-haired Holstein…
By Rainier Maria Rilke, translated by Marc J. Elzenbeck You who I foreseethe lost beloved who never comesI won’t know your favorite songsso have stopped trying to stopthe waves of your next momentswhich will surely obliterate this landscape. The cities, towers and bridgestwist and turn in their coursesof lands forever tremblingin the thrall of intermingling godswho…
By Marc J. Elzenbeck Washington State is eager to further cut carbon emissions. To that end, it’s anticipated to pass a law requiring residents to buy ultra-low rolling resistance tires when replacing original (OEM) equipment. Officials promise this will save hundreds per driver in fuel costs. This is true. For a given car or light…