By Daniel Hooker
I went to psychic the other day, and knocked on her door. She said, “Who’s there?”
I guessed she wasn’t a full psychic, only a medium, so I left.
~
From Steven at the Library.
Q: What is a librarian’s favorite type of mushroom?
A: Shhhh, talkies.
~
From Monet at Thriftway.
There were five ants that met. They moved in together, and together they became ten ants.
~
From Rachel at Ace Hardware.
When I was younger, I always wanted to become a Gregorian monk.
But I never got the chants.
~
Did you hear about the Island cabinet-maker who got arrested?
The charges were attempted counter fitting.
~
Q: What happens to Santa when he goes down a hot chimney?
A: He becomes a Crisp Kringle.
~
Q: What does Santa call elves who are in charge of Christmas music?
A: Metro gnomes, of course.
~
Q: What do you call a wreath of one-hundred dollar bills?
A: A wreath a’ Franklins.
~
I was watching an old “Galloping Gourmet.” The host being Australian, this time he was actually doing a broadcast from Australia, and he was making a meringue.
Everybody cheered after he finished doing his meringue.
I’m sort of confused, because I thought in Australia they boomerang.
~
Newsflash! A new, warmer than flannel pillowcase made of corduroy is in the news. It’s making “headlines” everywhere.
~
Do you want to hear a joke about Potassium?
K.
I like to tell jokes periodically.
